Happy 35!

A couple of days ago I turned 35!

Dammit suddenly I felt like a much older than a day before my birthday. All though, I can absolutely pass for someone not a day older than 29 or maybe younger :).

I feel a strange sense of pride and remorse at the same time.

Remorse because life is not all as i planned. Definitely not when it comes to losing your favourite things and letting go of loved ones to social norms or hard luck.

Also, on a lighter note 5 years ago when I turned 30, I vowed to retire at 35. Haha! and I am today looking for a job to pay my bills. Well I had a well deserved good long break to care of more important things. To fall back on the long pending list and re-prioritise.
And it is time to get back to what I am best at. A dynamic lifestyle, working professional plus a creative homemaker. Now I am hoping to retire by 45!

I accumulated so much wisdom, strength, love and intelligence over the 3 and half decades. SO many friends made, so much love made, so many connections on social media, contributed several pages on wikipedia.

Books read, cuisines tried, places visited, been crazy enough, been selfish, been selfless, been a daughter, sister, girl friend, wife and a mother!

History made, mysteries solved, seen life, death and so much in between.

Set goals and reached 'em, failed on some of 'em, set rules and broke 'em coz been overly emotional or stupid or silly.

My pride is my passion. The things I have enjoyed doing, commitments I make, love I share and things I care about are done absolutely passionately.

I was talking to my girlfriends the other day and the inevitable happened. We flashed back to memories from my Bachelor college days like we always do because those were the best days pf my life :). Simple, fun, innocent, unpretentious, eager, the first times, the best of friends...we were just teenagers. few years from now we are gonna be 40 and we felt we haven't changed a bit at the core.

I remember my mom, aunts and women of 40s in typical India wearing cotton sarees, venkatagiris, jewellery options moving from danglers to smaller ear studs etc. ;)  But i have been wearing clothes that I wore 10 years ago. Is it about time to change or update my wardrobe. Who cares. As long as you are comfortable and look presentable I guess.

Now that i have too tuch time on hand, my mind has been jumping across too many different subjects analysing too much too randomly... I hope not to have this kinda luxury in few weeks from now and think about more meaningful and fulfilling stuff. :)

while there are certain things that cannot be changed simply because you have no control what so ever on those or because it is not worth going though the complications it is gonna bring, I would strive to continue to live freely, laugh heartily, love unconditionally and let live nonjudgmentally.

Happy birthday to me :D



Comments

Unknown said…
Happy Birthday Nayana
5/12/15, 1:49 AM
Anonymous said…
An awesome analysis of an important milestone in life! I never had the guts to write about it as I was always scared to face these thresholds. What these periods in life give us, is that they present us with a wide range of opportunities to explore the different aspects of life which we wouldn’t have experienced had we been stuck up in the teens! Every passing year gives us the gift of maturity which you have accepted with dignity and again not losing the charms of the teens! You have said about the women of 40s who wear typical cotton saris and moving from danglers to studs. These people are those who have become enslaved to the dictates of societal expectations and norms. It is an expected norm to transform from a girl to an aunty and a boy to an uncle once they reach a certain age and by that they chose to leave behind the vibrant, vigorous and energetic youth in them. Well you differ from them! Age, as they say, is just a number and as long as your mind is young so does your attributes. Reading this blog let out your secret!! Wow man! You are 35! Well for me it is a Nayana in her teens always cuz it is the mind that matters for me and not the age!! Enjoy your another birthday as a teen amiga!! And stay so always!!!
5/12/15, 10:38 AM
Deepu said…
Thanks so much Manorama.
5/12/15, 10:47 AM
Deepu said…
Absolutely! could n't agree more Ashguy. That's what I take pride in. Thanks a lot for the kind words. :)

You have a fabulous one too!
5/12/15, 10:49 AM
Deepu said…
for me writing is more than just a hobby, though i am unable to do as often or as good as i like to. it is a learning experience, therapeutic, informative, reconciling, even revelating sometimes.
7/3/15, 9:31 PM
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